Our story begins in October of 2024 when mutual friends of ours told me about Richard & that we should meet. Well time got away from us so it didn’t happen.
On 12/28/24 I was with our mutual friends who said that they hadn’t heard from Richard in a while. Later that afternoon as I was having lunch, I decided that I was going to delete POF due to no luck. I had a few likes so I thought why not check them out first. The only one I responded to was Richard from Dalton. We started texting on POF & when he mentioned paranormal, ghost hunting, etc. I said wait a minute do you by any chance know my friends? He said that he did & asked if he could call me. I said sure just give me time to get home first.
When I got home we talked on the phone for 2 ½ hours until he asked me if I was hungry & like hibachi. I said yes so he asked me to join him at Fuji’s. It was the best first date I’ve ever had. The food was good & we had some of the best conversation that I’ve ever had with a man. I asked him what he was doing the next day & by the end of that conversation we ended up making plans to meet, go have breakfast then a trip to the Georgia Winery. When I got home we talked for another 3 hours on the phone. It was like we didn’t want the date to end.
When we met up the next morning to ride together, we both deleted our POF profiles in front of each other, well at least I did, as we’d talked about the previous night since we decided that we wanted to be exclusive so as to see where this might go. I truly felt that I’d found the type of man that I’ve wanted my whole life. He was good to me, respectful, nurturing. We laughed, talked about anything & everything for hours on end. The second date couldn’t have been any more perfect.
We didn’t spend New Year’s Eve together but we did spend the following weekend together. I was so happy. We would talk several times daily, texted during the day. That Saturday I asked him to accompany me to Dayton where I have a friend that does my manicures. We made a whole day of it having another wonderful time together. We even ended up having dinner with my daughter & her girlfriend. After that weekend he would come to my house to spend the weekends together. I jumped so quickly because I believe that life is short, we’re not promised tomorrow so if you have a chance, take it. Throughout the whole relationship he never asked me for a dime, was always a gentleman with the doors, etc. telling me not to worry that I had a Richard now.
On our 5 th weekend together we attended a Chocolate Fest in Knoxville with an overnight stay. By this time “we” were head over heels for each other or at least I was. We were even talking about when his lease ended at the end of the month with his studio apartment the he would move in with me. Yes I had asked HIM to move in with ME which I surprised myself by doing so but I “was in love” with the man. He was hesitant at first saying that since it was my house that I could kick him out at any time leaving him homeless with no place to go. It appeared to be a major concern with him so I reassured him that would never happen. Looking back I definitely did all the work for him. I made it so easy because all I wanted was to be loved & treated well.
On 1/27/25 he officially moved in. My dogs already loved him & it was mutual. My ex never did so that meant a lot to me. He bought groceries & cooked for us. We spent evenings together watching TV shows or movies we liked. He’d help me get up in the mornings since I’m profoundly deaf. I didn’t have to worry about missing the alarm. Barely 4 days after he moved in, we had a situation where the water heater went out. He found someone to come out & look at it. The repairs cost $370. I paid $100 & he paid the rest. We talked about & were planning on having a commitment ceremony this summer. Talking about rings we wanted, cake, venues, etc.
He planned a Valentine’s 3-day weekend for us in Gatlinburg, which was great. I never paid for anything, not even a $5 hair clip that I liked. Looking back I didn’t think about it at the time but when the first of February came Richard said that the management at the studio apartment where he rented took out rent for February that he was trying to get refunded. I know it happens. Then, on the 15th, he said that his company had changed payroll companies, and his check was held up. Again, I know that happens.
Weekends were spent going to breakfast at least one morning with our favorite spot being First Watch in Chattanooga. Then spending time doing whatever we decided to do. I was very interested in ghost hunting so we even went several places. I learned that I’m definitely an empath which I suspected that I was.
Upon our return from Gatlinburg my bonus daughter asked me about Richard. Basic info because she was curious about who this man was that was making me so happy. It was Tuesday evening, she called me a little later telling me some things she found out & asked me to come over so she could show me what she found but not to say anything yet to Richard just in case. So I made an excuse & went over. Well she had looked up Richard on Facebook. The first thing she came across was the Ex-Wives Undercover. I know she reached out & talked to someone but I’m not sure who. She’d done some good research but I was in shock, denial. I thought no way this wasn’t lies. She even talked to my family about the situation & what she should do. I returned home giving Richard some excuse as to what happened because I didn’t want to tell him & get him upset as I was. He’d always told me that his recent ex-wife was out to get him, to destroy him. So not knowing any better I believed him. He even had our mutual friends convinced about her. Then my daughter became involved. She did talk to several of the ladies & now she had a mission to save her mom. The next two days information just kept coming my way. I think I talked to his recent ex-wife but I’m not sure due to the turmoil I was in. It was so hard to believe. I did talk a long time with an ex-wife of his that he didn’t tell me about. I also talked to a girlfriend that he’d kept a secret from others & his great niece. To say I had information overload, to say that I was in denial is a huge understatement. I kept all this to myself never telling Richard about all this information I was getting. He’d ask me what was wrong & I’d brush it off saying I was okay just tired or something. I couldn’t for the life of me bring myself to tell him what all was going on. On Friday my daughter along with my bonus daughter & her hubby went to my house to confront Richard. She ended up telling him that he needed to move out of my house until all this could be figured out, settled. He left but he was upset, furious with the ones who’d asked him to leave, with me for believing everything I was told instead of talking to him. I told him that well I spoke to an ex-wife you never told me about. His response “All of my past isn’t any of your business just like all of yours is not mine. What is our business are us & our future”. Looking back on when I met up with him the next day to give him some mail & a few things he’d forgotten he was “hurt”, cold, almost heartless basically laying all the blame on me for not trusting him, not believing him, not coming to him first & mostly for putting him in the position of being homeless. He was also furious for reaching out to an ex-wife of his in Dayton. No are you okay, I know you’re hurting too, we’ll work this out. He even told me that he’d hoped with me that all the things of the past was over, that he could move on from that & finally be happy. That he loved me more than he had anyone else. Hello Mr. Narcissist, goodbye the man that I thought I fell in love with.
Eventually I did start talking to his recent ex-wife and the others some more. In the beginning my heart had problems accepting all this but my mind kept telling me that over 6 women wouldn’t have the same consistent experience with Richard. It took me some time & a lot of tears but I’ve now learned & moved on from this experience. One day I still hope to eventually find the right man for me.